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Authors:

David Sedaris quotes about people

American Writer December 26, 1956

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Quotes

I’d always been afraid of sick people, and so had my mother. It wasn’t that we feared catching their brain aneurysm or accidentally ripping out their IV. I think it was their fortitude that frightened us. Sick people reminded us not of what we had, but of what we lacked. Everything we said sounded petty and insignificant; our complaints paled in the face of theirs, and without our complaints, there was nothing to say. David Sedaris
David Sedaris quote: "I'm the most important person in the lives of almost everyone..."
I'm the most important person in the lives of almost everyone I know and a good number of the people I've never even met. David Sedaris
For as long as I can remember, my father saved. He saves money, he saves disfigured sticks that resemble disfigured celebrities, and most of all, he saves food. Cherry tomatoes, sausage biscuits, the olives plucked from other people's martinis --he hides these things in strange places until they are rotten. And then he eats them. David Sedaris
After that there was nothing left to say as nothing gets on my nerves more than someone repeating the same phrase twice. I think it’s something people have picked up from television, this emotional stutter. Rather than say something interesting once, they repeat a clich and hope for the same effect David Sedaris
David Sedaris quote: "I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like..."
I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like you. David Sedaris
Kools and Newports were for black people and lower-class whites. Camels were for procrastinators, those who wrote bad poetry, and those who put off writing bad poetry. Merits were for sex addicts, Salems were for alcoholics, and Mores were for people who considered themselves to be outrageous but really weren't. David Sedaris
A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at. David Sedaris
The reverend insists we occupy the first pew. He rang us up not long ago, tipsy-- he's a tippler-- saying that our faces brought him closer to God. And it's true, we're terribly good-looking people. David Sedaris
In other parts of the country people tried to stay together for the sake of the children. In New York they tried to work things out for the sake of the apartment. David Sedaris
They were nothing like the French people I had imagined. If anything, they were too kind, too generous and too knowledgable in the fields of plumbing and electricity. David Sedaris
The drama bug strikes hardest with Jews, homosexuals and plump women who wear their hair in bangs. These are people who, for one reason or another, desperately crave attention David Sedaris
Hugh returned from his trip, and days later I still sounded like a Red Chinese asking questions about the democratic hinterlands. "And you actually saw people smoking in restuarants? Really! And offices, too? Oh, tell me again about the ashtrays in the hospital waiting room, and don't leave anything out. David Sedaris
She said, “I’m going to have you fired.” I had two people say that to me today, “I’m going to have you fired.” Go ahead, be my guest. I’m wearing a green velvet costume; it doesn’t get any worse than this. Who do these people think they are? I’m going to have you fired!” and I wanted to lean over and say, “I’m going to have you killed. David Sedaris
When I look at a lot of older stuff that I've written, I think one sign of amateur humor writing is when you see people trying too hard. David Sedaris
David Sedaris quote: "I like nonfiction books about people with wretched lives."
I like nonfiction books about people with wretched lives. David Sedaris

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