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Eddie Izzard Quotes

Eddie Izzard quotes

British Comedian February 7, 1962

Eddie Izzard quotes in russian
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Quotes

I am a professional transvestite, so I can run about in heels and not fall over. Cause if a woman falls over wearing heels, that’s embarrassing. But if a bloke falls over wearing heels, you have to kill yourself. It’s the end of your life. Eddie Izzard
Eddie Izzard quote: "There was no religion in my life growing up. Did God invent us..."
There was no religion in my life growing up. Did God invent us or did we invent God? Eddie Izzard
I'd be happy to be taken as a woman - and that's what I was initially trying to do when I started throwing on dresses and stuff. But that wasn't going to happen because everyone kept calling me sir. So I thought I'd change the method and just start wearing what I wanted to wear. Eddie Izzard
Eddie Izzard quote: "I just believe in the goodwill of people, the power of people..."
I just believe in the goodwill of people, the power of people to do something positive. Eddie Izzard
I mean, sometimes... a comedian becomes an actor, and they just don't deliver, because the bottom line of comedy is to be funny, and the bottom line of acting is to be truthful, and they get that mixed up sometimes, or don't even notice that that's the thing. Eddie Izzard
I use a Bruce Lee technique: 'The way of no way.' He had the idea that he would learn everything, so that whoever he had to fight, he could improvise anything. The best way of starting a gig is just to not think of anything - to clear your mind, not in an empty Zen state, but more just to go on and see where you go. Eddie Izzard
But with dogs, we do have "bad dog." Bad dog exists. "Bad dog! Bad dog! Stole a biscuit, bad dog!" The dog is saying, "Who are you to judge me? You human beings who’ve had genocide, war against people of different creeds, colors, religions, and I stole a biscuit?! Is that a crime? People of the world!" "Well, if you put it that way, I think you’ve got a point. Have another biscuit, sorry. Eddie Izzard
So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then President Clinton lied about a relationship, and everyone was surprised! A little nave, I feel! Eddie Izzard
Eddie Izzard quote: "My stand-up is quite good now, people say. It's just like a..."
My stand-up is quite good now, people say. It's just like a big conversation each time. Every gig is a rehearsal. Eddie Izzard
In stand-up it really helps to play yourself and talk about your own feelings. You cannot fail to be original if you're just talking about what you think about X, Y and Z. Unless you've got a twin brother who's also a stand-up. Eddie Izzard
And I think that if God did exist, he had many children. I think Jesus proves this. Jesus must be the seventh son of God. A-sus, B-sus, C-sus, D-sus, E-sus, F-sus, G-sus. That's just logic. That's just mathematical. And T-sus would always be fucking about. And P-sus does deliveries. C-sus started the Roman Empire. Cae-sus. F-sus, City in Turkey. B-sus was covered in something. Some people applauding there; other people going, "What?" ... B-sus was covered in bees. Eddie Izzard
Eddie Izzard quote: "I like my coffee hot and strong. Like I like my women: hot and..."
I like my coffee hot and strong. Like I like my women: hot and strong...with a spoon in them. Eddie Izzard
I'm quite good at taking in information so I voraciously inhale Wikipedia - which may have some things wrong in it, but I think is generally more information than we had before. Last tour we didn't have Wikipedia. And then Discovery Channel and History Channel. I can take it in and retain what I think are the most important facts. Eddie Izzard
Eddie Izzard quote: "Boy bands should be exploded from a great height. They're just..."
Boy bands should be exploded from a great height. They're just pretty people singing music written by others. Eddie Izzard
Your eyes flashed fire into my soul. I immediately read the words of Dostoyevsky and Karl Marx, and in the words of Albert Schweitzer, I FANCY YOU! Eddie Izzard

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