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Jon Stewart Quotes

Jon Stewart quotes

American Entertainer November 28, 1962

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Quotes

Jon Stewart quote: "I’m not going to censor myself to comfort your ignorance"
I’m not going to censor myself to comfort your ignorance Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "If "con" is the opposite of pro, then isn't Congress the..."
If "con" is the opposite of pro, then isn't Congress the opposite of progress? Or did we just fucking blow your mind?!? Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "I thinking gay and straight people use the same putters, it's..."
I thinking gay and straight people use the same putters, it's not a matter of putters but a matter of hole selection. Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "I can be in 20 movies. But I'll never be an actor."
I can be in 20 movies. But I'll never be an actor. Jon Stewart
If the events of September 11, 2001, have proven anything, it's that the terrorists can attack us, but they can't take away what makes us American - our freedom, our liberty, our civil rights. No, only Attorney General John Ashcroft can do that. Jon Stewart
I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land. Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "I heard Dennis Kucinich say in a debate, 'When I'm..."
I heard Dennis Kucinich say in a debate, 'When I'm president... and I just wanted to stop him and say, 'Dude.' Jon Stewart
The Supreme Court ruled that disabled golfer Casey Martin has a legal right to ride in a golf cart between shots at PGA Tour events. Man, the next thing you know, they're going to have some guy carry his clubs around for him. Jon Stewart
More than 150 heads of state attended the UN Summit, giving New Yorkers a chance to get in touch with prejudices they didn't even know they had. Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is..."
I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is institutionalizing the advantages that wealth gives you. Jon Stewart
If you're going to give people 20 minutes of news satire, you've also got to give them Tiffani-Amber Thiessen or you're going to have rioting in the streets. Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch."
Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch. Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "Cause if there's one thing Islamic terrorists don't have..."
Cause if there's one thing Islamic terrorists don't have is....(seriously thinking about it)....%#@&! Jon Stewart
There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it! Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart quote: "Parenthood is an amazing opportunity to be able to ruin..."
Parenthood is an amazing opportunity to be able to ruin someone from scratch. Jon Stewart

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