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Jon Stewart Quotes

The seven marvels that best represent man's achievements over the last 2,000 years will be determined by Internet vote... so look for Howard Stern's Private Parts to come in No. 1.

Jon Stewart

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Mickey Gilley quote: "Back then I thought if you cut a record, you were..."
Back then I thought if you cut a record, you were automatically a star. Mickey Gilley
I've been known to turn up drunk at triathlons and do very well. I'm more of a heat-of-the-moment type of guy. A friend will tell me about something coming up, maybe that weekend, and usually not an abundance of thought goes into my doing it. Ryan Kwanten
There are two levels of vampirism: one is the regular vampire, which is just like it has always been; and then there's the super vampires, which are a new breed we've created. Guillermo del Toro
Daniel Mainwaring quote: "Seems like everything people oughta know they just don't want..."
Seems like everything people oughta know they just don't want to hear. I guess that's the big trouble with the world. Daniel Mainwaring
But you know, it's not easy when your husband runs for president. I mean, it's not easy for me. I'm sure it's not easy for her. There's a lot of scrutiny on families that isn't always wanted. Laura Bush
Damien Hirst quote: "I always feel like the art's there and I just see it, so it's..."
I always feel like the art's there and I just see it, so it's not really a lot of work. Damien Hirst
Harriet Martineau quote: "A soul preoccupied with great ideas best performs small duties."
A soul preoccupied with great ideas best performs small duties. Harriet Martineau
Ivan Illich quote: "To hell with the future. It's a man-eating idol."
To hell with the future. It's a man-eating idol. Ivan Illich
In the ordinary affairs of life we do not require nor expect demonstrative evidence, because it is inconsistent with the nature of matters of fact, and to insist on its production would be unreasonable and absurd. Simon Greenleaf
Jack White quote: "I certainly wouldn't want a song that I'd already written to..."
I certainly wouldn't want a song that I'd already written to be used on a commercial. That seems strange. Jack White
For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons. Douglas Adams
To talk, simply to talk! It sounds so little, and how much it is! When you have existed to the brink of middle age in bitter loneliness, among people to whom your true opinion on every subject on earth is blasphemy, the need to talk is the greatest of all needs. George Orwell
Robert Frost quote: "Before I built a wall I'd ask to know. What I was walling in..."
Before I built a wall I'd ask to know. What I was walling in or walling out, And to whom I was like to give offense. Robert Frost
Ryan Lochte quote: "The big picture is the Trials and Olympics. I just have to..."
The big picture is the Trials and Olympics. I just have to keep focused for that, keep moving forward. Ryan Lochte
James Joyce quote: "When I die, Dublin will be written on my heart."
When I die, Dublin will be written on my heart. James Joyce