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Authors:
Lewis Black Quotes

Lewis Black quotes about saying

American Comedian August 30, 1948

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Quotes

All you had to say was, 'I am a writer,' and you became one. You didn't even have to write anything. You could just sit in a coffee shop with a notebook and stare into space, with a slightly bemused look on your face, judging the weight of the world with a jaundiced eye. As you can see, you can be completely full of shit and still be a writer...I also thought it was going to be a great way to meet girls, but it wasn't--probably because as I was staring into space, I no doubt looked mildly... Lewis Black
Lewis Black quote: "That's the funny thing about religion: it doesn't matter what..."
That's the funny thing about religion: it doesn't matter what you say, you're going to upset someone. Lewis Black
Behind me, I heard a young woman of 25 say, "If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college." Now, I'm gonna repeat that, because it bears repeating. "If it weren't for my horse..." as in, giddyup, giddyup, let's go — "I wouldn't have spent that year in college," which is a degree-granting institution. Don't think about that too long, or BLOOD will shoot out your NOSE! Lewis Black
Lewis Black quote: "I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say,..."
I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not. Lewis Black
A republican stands up in congress and says 'I GOT A REALLY BAD IDEA!!' and the democrat stands up after him and says 'AND I CAN MAKE IT SHITTIER!! Lewis Black

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