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Authors:

Robert Benchley quotes

American Comedian September 15, 1889 – September 21, 1945

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Quotes

As the storm came nearer I began to realize that I hadn't made the most of my three years' immunity. In fact, I hadn't done a single thing about cleaning up my life. I was, if anything, an even more logical target for lightning than the last time I was in range. And thunderstorms don't creep up on you at seven o'clock in the morning in a non-thunderstorm country for nothing, you know. I lined up a rather panicky schedule of reforms...But as the storm suddenly petered out and went off in the... Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity..."
The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The..."
A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death. Robert Benchley
You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "There are two kinds of travel: first class and with children."
There are two kinds of travel: first class and with children. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the..."
A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. Robert Benchley
The problem of what to wear while lolling about the house on a Sunday afternoon is becoming more and more acute as the fashions in lolling garments change. The American home is in danger of taking on the appearance of an Oriental bordello. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and..."
In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around..."
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. Robert Benchley
It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous. Robert Benchley
It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother who lets..."
Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother who lets him have one Robert Benchley
After an author has been dead for some time, it becomes increasingly difficult for his publishers to get a new book out of him each year. Robert Benchley
Robert Benchley quote: "If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe,..."
If Mr. Einstein doesn't like the natural laws of the universe, let him go back to where he came from. Robert Benchley
Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about. Robert Benchley

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