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Stephen Colbert quotes about new

American Comedian May 13, 1964

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Quotes

Stephen Colbert quote: "NASA scientists have discovered a new form of life,..."
NASA scientists have discovered a new form of life, unfortunately, it won't date them either. Stephen Colbert
Tomorrow you're all going to wake up in a brave new world, a world where the Constitution gets trampled by an army of terrorist clones, created in a stem-cell research lab run by homosexual doctors who sterilize their instruments over burning American flags. Where tax-and-spend Democrats take all your hard-earned money and use it to buy electric cars for National Public Radio, and teach evolution to illegal immigrants. Oh, and everybody's high! Stephen Colbert
Stephen Colbert quote: "A new study shows that having a severe phobia can hasten..."
A new study shows that having a severe phobia can hasten aging. But what if my greatest fear IS aging?!? Stephen Colbert
Stephen Colbert quote: "New study reveals men like to cuddle. Another study reveals..."
New study reveals men like to cuddle. Another study reveals men will say anything to get into bed with a woman. Stephen Colbert
Truthiness is tearing apart our country, and I don't mean the argument over who came up with the word. I don't know whether it's a new thing, but it's certainly a current thing, in that it doesn't seem to matter what facts are. It used to be, everyone was entitled to their own opinion, but not their own facts. But that's not the case anymore. Facts matter not at all. Perception is everything. Stephen Colbert
Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping. Stephen Colbert
Stephen Colbert quote: "I don't like the new president who hunts muslim extremists, I..."
I don't like the new president who hunts muslim extremists, I like the old president who is a muslim extremist. Stephen Colbert

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