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Steven Wright quotes

American Comedian December 6, 1955

TOP 10 Steven Wright quotes

Steven Wright quotes in french
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Quotes

Steven Wright quote: "Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow."
Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "At one point he decided enough was enough."
At one point he decided enough was enough. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the..."
In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?"
What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious? Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have..."
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? Steven Wright
So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and ?m dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over... Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?"
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange? Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink?"
How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink? Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "Why are they called buildings when they’re already finished?..."
Why are they called buildings when they’re already finished? Shouldn’t they be called builts? Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "The other day I... uh, no, that wasn't me."
The other day I... uh, no, that wasn't me. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it..."
I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you..."
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "So, do you live around here often?"
So, do you live around here often? Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "A metaphor is like a simile."
A metaphor is like a simile. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? Steven Wright

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