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Steven Wright quotes

American Comedian December 6, 1955

TOP 10 Steven Wright quotes

Steven Wright quotes in french
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Quotes

Steven Wright quote: "Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes."
Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a couple of mistakes. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "Right now I’m having amnesia and dj vu at the same time. I..."
Right now I’m having amnesia and dj vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to..."
I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it. Steven Wright
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year.I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one."
I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "is it good if a vacume really sucks?"
is it good if a vacume really sucks? Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "I don’t have to walk my dog anymore. I walked him all at once."
I don’t have to walk my dog anymore. I walked him all at once. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars,..."
The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof? Steven Wright
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they’d never expect it. Steven Wright
I heard that in relativity theory, space and time are the same thing. Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "What a nice night for an evening."
What a nice night for an evening. Steven Wright
I have a map of the United States... Actual size. It says, 'Scale: 1 mile = 1 mile.' I spent last summer folding it. I hardly ever unroll it. People ask me where I live, and I say, 'E6. Steven Wright
When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over..."
I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding. Steven Wright
Steven Wright quote: "If God dropped acid, would he see people?"
If God dropped acid, would he see people? Steven Wright

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