English En
  • Deutsche De
  • English En
  • Français Fr
  • Русский Ru

We use cookies to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our marketing and analytics partners who may combine it with other information you've provided to them or which they've separately collected from you. You also may to see our Privacy Policy. By clicking the OK button below, you accept our cookies.

Authors:

Roommate Quotes

Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, "Do I know you? Steven Wright
Yossarian's attitude toward his roommates turned merciful and protective at the mere recollection of Captain Black. It was not their fault that they were young and cheerful, he reminded himself as he carried the swinging beam of his flashlight back through the darkness. He wished that he could be young and cheerful, too. And it wasn't their fault that they were courageous, confident and carefree. He would just have to be patient with them until one or two were killed and the rest wounded,... Joseph Heller
The thing is, it's really hard to be roommates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs--if yours are really good ones and theirs aren't. You think if they're intelligent and all, the other person, and have a good sense of humor, that they don't give a damn whose suitcases are better, but they do. They really do. J. D. Salinger
You must have six boxes of cat food in that cupboard."Moshe gets cranky if I don't keep a variety."After tasking his breakfast, Alan found it better than he had expected. "I have a hard time understanding anyone as strong-willed as you being intimidated by a temperamental cat."Shelby lifted her shoulders and continued to eat. "We all have our weaknesses. Besides, as roommates go, he's perfect. He doesn't listen in on my phone calls or borrow my clothes."Are those your prerequisites?"They're... Nora Roberts
I was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that's when I realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater. Demetri Martin
Having a baby is like suddenly getting the world's worst roommate, like having Janis Joplin with a bad hangover and PMS come to stay with you. Anne Lamott
Anne Lamott quote: "Having a baby is like suddenly getting the world's worst..."
Having a baby is like suddenly getting the world's worst roommate. Anne Lamott
Leighton Meester quote: "Everyone has this universal understanding of roommate drama."
Everyone has this universal understanding of roommate drama. Leighton Meester
Steven Wright quote: "My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the..."
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. Steven Wright
Mary-Kate Olsen quote: "We have been roommates our entire lives. We just bought a..."
We have been roommates our entire lives. We just bought a place together. Mary-Kate Olsen
I drove around in a Volkswagen Rabbit I shared with one of my roommates, and it didn't have a roof. It doesn't rain much in L.A., but when it did, it was utterly miserable. Jon Hamm
I remember when I was in college, I used to watch Julia Child's cooking show during dinner and joke with my roommates about becoming a TV chef. Martin Yan
My wife and I met when each of us was dragged to a party we didn't want to go to by friends. I was coming off a bad injury, but my roommate insisted I get out of the house and be around people. God love our friends; we've been together 20 years now! Michael Chiklis
J. D. Salinger quote: "Its really hard to be roommates with people if your suitcases..."
Its really hard to be roommates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs. J. D. Salinger
Al Roker quote: "My first college roommate greeted me with a shocked silence..."
My first college roommate greeted me with a shocked silence followed by, 'So... you're black.' Al Roker

Popular Topics

Popular Author