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Witty Quotes (page 2)

Women, as some witty Frenchman once put it, inspire us with the desire to do masterpieces and always prevent us from carrying them out. Oscar Wilde
I always say that I only wish to have three sorts of people as my friends, those who are very rich, those who are very witty, and those who are very beautiful. Christopher Isherwood
Aristotle quote: "Melancholy men, of all others, are the most witty."
Melancholy men, of all others, are the most witty. Aristotle
Plainly, this unwillingness to give ground even on unimportant disagreements is the symptom of some deepseated insecurity, as was my one-time fondness for making teasing remarks (which I amended when I read Anthony Powell's matter-of-fact observation that teasing is an unfailing sign of misery within) and as is my very pronounced impatience. The struggle, therefore, is to try and cultivate the virtuous side of these shortcomings: to be a genial host while only slightly whiffled, for example,... Christopher Hitchens
I'm trying to think of a witty comeback, when Boggs says brusquely, “Well, don't expect us to be too impressed. We just saw Finnick Odair in his underwear.” I decide to go ahead and like Boggs. Suzanne Collins
Friedrich Nietzsche quote: "Every habit makes our hand more witty, and out wit more handy."
Every habit makes our hand more witty, and out wit more handy. Friedrich Nietzsche
[Shahrazad] had perused the books, annals and legends of preceding Kings, and the stories, examples and instances of by gone men and things; indeed it was said that she had collected a thousand books of histories relating to antique races and departed rulers. She had perused the works of the poets and knew them by heart; she had studied philosophy and the sciences, arts and accomplishments; and she was pleasant and polite, wise and witty, well read and well bred. Richard Francis Burton
The cocktail filled him with a whirling exhilaration behind which he was aware of devastating desires—to rush places in fast motors, to kiss girls, to sing, to be witty. ... He perceived that he had gifts of profligacy which had been neglected. —chapter 8 Sinclair Lewis
Elsie de Wolfe quote: "Be pretty if you can, be witty if you must, but be gracious if..."
Be pretty if you can, be witty if you must, but be gracious if it kills you. Elsie de Wolfe
Never ask while you are doing it if what you are doing is fun. Don't introduce even your most reliably witty acquaintance as someone who will set the table on a roar. Christopher Hitchens
Look around you. Watch how people function and interact with one another. You'll see this is going on everywhere all the time. People devour each other in the name of love, or family or country. But that's an excuse; they're just hungry and want to be fed. Read their faces, the newspapers, read what it says on their T-shirts! 'I think you're mistaking me for someone who gives a shit.' 'My parents went to London but all they brought me back was this lousy T-shirt.' 'So many women, so little... Jonathan Carroll
William Shakespeare quote: "I am not only witty in myself, but the cause that wit is in..."
I am not only witty in myself, but the cause that wit is in other men. William Shakespeare
The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool."Conversation should be pleasant without scurrility, witty without affectation, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel without falsehood."Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie."Suspicion always haunts the guilty mind."(This guy must have written a long time ago.) William Shakespeare
Sacha Guitry quote: "You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty."
You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty. Sacha Guitry
Can anything be more disgusting than to hear people called 'educated' making small jokes about eating ham, and showing themselves empty of any real knowledge as to the relation of their own social and religious life to the history of the people they think themselves witty in insulting? [...] The best thing that can be said of it is, that it is a sign of the intellectual narrowness—in plain English, the stupidity which is still the average mark of our culture. George Eliot

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