English En
  • Deutsche De
  • English En
  • Français Fr
  • Русский Ru

We use cookies to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our marketing and analytics partners who may combine it with other information you've provided to them or which they've separately collected from you. You also may to see our Privacy Policy. By clicking the OK button below, you accept our cookies.

Authors:

Chelsea Handler Quotes

The problem with the suspenders my mother bought for him is that he hasn't adjusted the straps since he got them. So instead of attaching somewhere around his midsection, the suspenders clip onto his pants three inches below his nipples. Now picture the suspenders attached to sweatpants. This vision is what first led me to coin the term "camel balls.

Chelsea Handler

About author

Related Authors

Topics

Quotes currently Trending

Andrew Niccol quote: "Nine out of 10 war victims die from a gun."
Nine out of 10 war victims die from a gun. Andrew Niccol
Jennifer Granholm quote: "I really want to be governor when I have a partner in the..."
I really want to be governor when I have a partner in the White House. Jennifer Granholm
Possessing perfect knowledge I hover above him as he hacks me to bits. I see his rough childhood. I see his mother doing something horrid to him with a broomstick. I see the hate in his heart and the people he has yet to kill before pneumonia gets him at eighty-three. I see the dead kid’s mom unable to sleep, pounding her fists against her face in grief at the moment I was burying her son’s hand. I see the pain I’ve caused. I see the man I could have been, and the man I was, and then... George Saunders
Yet how hard most people work for mere dust and ashes and care, taking no thought of growing in knowledge and grace, never having time to get in sight of their own ignorance. John Muir
Bette Davis quote: "We movie stars all end up by ourselves. Who knows? Maybe we..."
We movie stars all end up by ourselves. Who knows? Maybe we want to. Bette Davis
Ezra Taft Benson quote: "You cannot do wrong and feel right. It is impossible!"
You cannot do wrong and feel right. It is impossible! Ezra Taft Benson
Yet higher religion, which is only a search for a larger life, is essentially experience and recognized the necessity of experience as its foundation long before science learnt to do so. Muhammad Iqbal
Phaedrus quote: "In a change of masters the poor change nothing except their..."
In a change of masters the poor change nothing except their master's name. Phaedrus
Sally Ride quote: "The space shuttle is a better and safer rocket than it was..."
The space shuttle is a better and safer rocket than it was before the Challenger accident. Sally Ride
Isaac Asimov quote: "We're forever teetering on the brink of the unknowable, and..."
We're forever teetering on the brink of the unknowable, and trying to understand what can't be understood. Isaac Asimov
Sydney Smith quote: "Correspondences are like small clothes before the invention of..."
Correspondences are like small clothes before the invention of suspenders; it is impossible to keep them up. Sydney Smith
While there is a chance of the world getting through its troubles, I hold that a reasonable man has to behave as though he were sure of it. If at the end your cheerfulness in not justified, at any rate you will have been cheerful. H. G. Wells
And there comes a time in your life when you realize that if you don't take the opportunity to be happy, you may never get another chance again. Richard Russo
We have lingered in the chambers of the sea. By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown. Till human voices wake us... and we drown. T. S. Eliot
Penelope Cruz quote: "One thing that I am proud of: I am really capable of laughing..."
One thing that I am proud of: I am really capable of laughing at myself. Penelope Cruz