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Dave Barry Quotes

Dave Barry quotes

American Journalist July 3, 1947

Dave Barry quotes in russian
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Quotes

Dave Barry quote: "If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the..."
If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally..."
The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins. Dave Barry
The voice belonged to Mr. Pzyrbovich, an algebra teacher who was always called Mr. P, for obvious reasons. He has a heavy accent, which a lot of kids said made him hard to understand, although to be fair some of these kids would have never understood algebra anyway. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a..."
Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship. Dave Barry
It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "He was distracted by a giggle, and turned to see a rare sight:..."
He was distracted by a giggle, and turned to see a rare sight: a girl. Dave Barry
He felt a momentary pang of regret that he had not spent more time with his beloved wife. But it passed when he remembered that the reason he’d gone to sea in the first place was that he had never really liked his beloved wife. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business."
Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business. Dave Barry
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear. Dave Barry
There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you finally see what goes on underwater, you realize that you've been missing the whole point of the ocean. Staying on the surface all the time is like going to the circus and staring at the outside of the tent. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling..."
The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "Stache’s attack was perfectly timed, thanks to his..."
Stache’s attack was perfectly timed, thanks to his veteran-pirate grasp tactics—and a big piece if luck. Dave Barry
Dave Barry quote: "Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's..."
Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column. Dave Barry
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M's and a chocolate cake. I feel better already. Dave Barry
...when the armed robber of unhappiness knocks over the Keebler cookie display of our complacency, and bangs the samurai sword of negativity on the checkout counter of our dreams, we must not be afraid to hurl the fruit cocktail can of hope. Dave Barry

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