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Erma Bombeck Quotes

Erma Bombeck quote: "When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and..."

When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.

Erma Bombeck

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What celebrities are useful for is bringing attention to the public and making them more aware. They can be unbelievably effective. Diane Keaton
If I said to most of the people who auditioned, 'Good job, awesome, well done,' it would have made me actually look and feel ridiculous. It's quite obvious most of the people who turned up for this audition were hopeless. Simon Cowell
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George Eliot quote: "In the vain laughter of folly wisdom hears half its applause."
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe quote: "Combine truth and invention for the sake of a closer approach..."
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take a strict view of their excrements, and, from the colour, the odour, the taste, the consistence, the crudeness or maturity of digestion, form a judgment of their thoughts and designs; because men are never so serious, thoughtful, and intent, as when they are at stool... Jonathan Swift
I was born in my parents' bedroom on January 16. The World Almanac says it was 1909. I say it was 1912. But what difference does it make as long as I feel 33? Ethel Merman
Boring damned people. All over the earth. Propagating more boring damned people. What a horror show. The earth swarmed with them. Charles Bukowski
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Lao Tzu quote: "Its upper part is not bright, and its lower part is not obscure."
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You keep waiting for the moral of your life to become obvious, but it never does. Work, work, work: No moral. No plot. No eureka! Just production schedules and days. You might as well be living inside a photocopier. Your lives are all they're ever going to be. Doug Coupland
There is a great deal of political pressure to only talk about abstinence, and to deny support for condoms and education on using them. This policy will lead to the unnecessary deaths of many people. Hillary Clinton