English En
  • Deutsche De
  • English En
  • Français Fr
  • Русский Ru

We use cookies to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our marketing and analytics partners who may combine it with other information you've provided to them or which they've separately collected from you. You also may to see our Privacy Policy. By clicking the OK button below, you accept our cookies.

Authors:

George Carlin Quotes

A woman told me her child was autistic, and I thought she said artistic. So I said, 'Oh great. I'd like to see some of the things he's done.

George Carlin

About author

Related Authors

Topics

Quotes currently Trending

Natalie Gulbis quote: "Pebble Beach. It is tough and the lay out is amazing."
Pebble Beach. It is tough and the lay out is amazing. Natalie Gulbis
Simon Travaglia quote: "Don't borrow someone else's spectacles to view yourself with."
Don't borrow someone else's spectacles to view yourself with. Simon Travaglia
Marcel Proust quote: "She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her..."
She's got feet like boats, whiskers like an American, and her undies are filthy. Marcel Proust
You can lose people without them dying, and I have, from moving, from traveling. The emotion is real, it just doesn't actually have to do with death. I'm singing about what I know, and it's a song about longing for somebody who's disappeared in your life. Jon Crosby
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow, Creeps in this petty pace from day to day, To the last syllable of recorded time; And all our yesterdays have lighted fools. The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more. It is a tale. Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing. William Shakespeare
Jiddu Krishnamurti quote: "From innumerable complexities we must grow to simplicity; we..."
From innumerable complexities we must grow to simplicity; we must become simple in our inward life and in our outward needs. Jiddu Krishnamurti
People always say that you can't please everybody. I think that's a cop-out. Why not attempt it? 'Cause think of all the people you will please if you try. Kanye West
Barry Lopez quote: "Would the last animal, eating garbage and living on the last..."
Would the last animal, eating garbage and living on the last scrap of land, his mate dead, would he still forgive you? Barry Lopez
I will never hurt you. I will always help you. If you are hungry. I'll give you my food. If you are frightened. I am your friend. I love you now. And love does not end. Orson Scott Card
I'm afraid I talk a lot, too much, perhaps. I should have been a lawyer or a college professor or a windy politician, though I'm glad I am not any of these. Tom Glazer
Aldrich Ames quote: "I'm a traitor, but I don't consider myself a traitor."
I'm a traitor, but I don't consider myself a traitor. Aldrich Ames
For women of a certain age, how do you meet a guy, fall in love, and decide he's the right man to have children with? Your clock's ticking, you're looking at him, and it's a crazy, pressure-filled experience. Marcia Cross
Bern Williams quote: "People who say, 'Let the chips fall where they may,' usually..."
People who say, 'Let the chips fall where they may,' usually figure they will not be hit by a chip. Bern Williams
Clifton Fadiman quote: "Cheese...milk's leap toward immmortality..."
Cheese...milk's leap toward immmortality... Clifton Fadiman
Well now, I'd rather have you than a dozen boys, Anne,' said Matthew patting her hand. 'Just mind you that? rather than a dozen boys. Well now, I guess it wasn't a boy that took the Avery scholarship, was it? It was a girl? my girl? my girl that I'm proud of. L. M. Montgomery