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Groucho Marx quotes

American Comedian October 2, 1895 – August 19, 1977

TOP 10 Groucho Marx quotes

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Quotes

Groucho Marx quote: "I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt."
I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light."
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Military justice is to justice what military music is to music."
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does."
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Marriage is the chief cause of divorce."
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. Groucho Marx
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Would you mind getting off that fly paper and giving the flies..."
Would you mind getting off that fly paper and giving the flies a chance?"Ahhh, you can't trick me! Flies don't read papers! Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is..."
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Women should be obscene and not heard."
Women should be obscene and not heard. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon."
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that."
I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state..."
Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long..."
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "The only real laughter comes from despair."
The only real laughter comes from despair. Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx quote: "I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me..."
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members. Groucho Marx

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