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Rodney Dangerfield Quotes

Rodney Dangerfield quotes

American Comedian November 22, 1921 – October 5, 2004

TOP 10 Rodney Dangerfield quotes

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Quotes

Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my..."
I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "Life is just a bowl of pits."
Life is just a bowl of pits. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all."
If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all. Rodney Dangerfield
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me..."
My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met."
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met."
My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it."
I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap."
I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My mother had morning sickness after I was born."
My mother had morning sickness after I was born. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me."
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over,..."
A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled..."
I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself. Rodney Dangerfield
Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut..."
I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers. Rodney Dangerfield

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