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Rodney Dangerfield Quotes

Rodney Dangerfield quotes

American Comedian November 22, 1921 – October 5, 2004

TOP 10 Rodney Dangerfield quotes

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Quotes

Rodney Dangerfield quote: "When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them."
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up..."
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend. Rodney Dangerfield
Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask. Each time an actor acts he does not hide; he exposes himself. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of..."
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the..."
This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the..."
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass. Rodney Dangerfield
We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and..."
My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with..."
My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room..."
Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee...."
My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had..."
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother."
When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother. Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield quote: "What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and..."
What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife. Rodney Dangerfield
My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it. Rodney Dangerfield

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