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Tim Allen Quotes

Tim Allen quotes

American Comedian June 13, 1953

Tim Allen quotes in french
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  • Quotes Topics

  • men

Quotes

One thing you'll never hear boys--or for that matter, men--saying is, "Charlie, that's a good-looking shirt. Kind of a fun thing. And those trousers make your ass look nice. Can I borrow those? Tim Allen
Anyway, they used to beat up on Barry all the time. They called it roughhousing, which is like men calling lying bullshitting. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults."
I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and..."
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car."
I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a..."
Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my..."
I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid. I've never gotten over it. Tim Allen
I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children. Tim Allen
The greatest missile in the world is useless...unless it's targeted. A torpedo is adrift unless it has someplace to go. An arrow is pointless unless it hits something. So it's important for kids—for everyone, even if you fail at first—to target something and head in that direction. With all your might. Tim Allen
While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "You don't know what people are really like until they're under..."
You don't know what people are really like until they're under a lot of stress. Tim Allen
Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "Well, would you look at that? I put on my wife's blouse again."
Well, would you look at that? I put on my wife's blouse again. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything."
Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything. Tim Allen
Tim Allen quote: "I'm a creative guy, artistically with graphics."
I'm a creative guy, artistically with graphics. Tim Allen

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