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Ass Quotes (page 4)

Sex is something I really don't understand too hot. You never know where the hell you are. I keep making up these sex rules for myself, and then I break them right away. Last year I made a rule that I was going to quite horsing around with girls that, deep down, gave me a pain in the ass. I broke it, though, the same week I made it - the same night, as a matter of fact. I spent the whole night necking with a terrible phony named Anne Louise Sherman. Sex is something I just don't understand. I... J. D. Salinger
Then Lymond’s voice, the chill gone, said, ‘Don’t be an ass, Jerott? You know I can’t do without you.’ It was an obvious answer. But it was also something Jerott had never had from Lymond before: an apology and an appeal both at once. Dorothy Dunnett
The man's tongue is fit to frighten the French. Another fever."Ah, there," said Morgan, "that comed of sp'iling Bibles."That comed--as you call it--of being arrant asses. Robert Louis Stevenson
Nothing is worse than to finish a good shit, then reach over and find the toilet paper container empty. Even the most horrible human being on earth deserves to wipe his ass. Charles Bukowski
Found in a small stone cave bitten from the roadside, stitchless save for his great outsized boots and a plague of flies, fat on the human scrappage of dinners long past, Toad squatted in the slitted stomach of a warm child, eating loudly the face of her hapless, headless father, who sat a good foot off the ground impaled up the ass on a pointed post. Nick Cave
What about San Francisco?"What about it?"Did you like it?"She shrugged. "It was O.K."Just O.K.?"She laughed. "Good God!"What?"You're all alike here."How so?" he asked."You demand adoration for the place. You're not happy until everybody swears undying love for every nook and cranny of every precious damn --"Whoa, missy."Well, it's true. Can't you just worship it on your own? Do I have to sign an affadavit?"He chuckled. "We're that bad, are we?"You bet your ass you are. Armistead Maupin
...the new world, the communo-bourgeois, sermonizing, Tartuffian, automobilistic, alcoholic, gluttonous and cancerous world has only two anxieties: ass and bank account... Louis-Ferdinand Celine
Charles Bukowski quote: "you boys can keep your virgins give me hot old women in high..."
you boys can keep your virgins give me hot old women in high heels with asses that forgot to get old. Charles Bukowski
...so I looked at this kid from West Texas, feelin' all cut up an' betrayed 'cause he suddenly realized the Land of the Free been fuckin' him in the ass all his life--an' I told myself, 'Shit, so that's what it's like to be the white boy. Any nigga you ask can tell you that's how America works. Garth Ennis
Always, you wake up to an unpleasant memory and an unpleasant body and your spirit is reduced to a pile of dirty ashes residing somewhere inside of your ass. You've gotta face the music, which is a beautiful island outside, but you can't even bear to look out the window. Anthony Kiedis
T. H. White quote: "Gawaine and Gareth took turns with the fat ass, one of them..."
Gawaine and Gareth took turns with the fat ass, one of them whacking it while the other rode bareback. T. H. White
...the moment you begin to believe you're worthy of the good things in your life - God gets all Old Testament on your ass and does something vicious, something insane, something totally uncalled for. He gives you lupus or He allows Satan to slaughter your children and cattle or He delivers Ohio to George W. Bush. Dan Savage
Mark Twain quote: "I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55."
I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55. Mark Twain
One of the strongest natural proofs of the folly of hereditary right in kings, is, that nature disapproves it, otherwise, she would not so frequently turn it into ridicule by giving mankind an ass for a lion. Thomas Paine
My own opinion is enough for me, and I claim the right to have it defended against any consensus, any majority, anywhere, any place, any time. And anyone who disagrees with this can pick a number, get in line, and kiss my ass. Christopher Hitchens

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