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Bathroom Quotes

Bathroom humor, fart, and poo poo humor in movies gets a laugh. It's a pretty easy audience, and that's been around for ages. Selma Blair
When I was in high school, I remember seeing girls crying in the bathroom every Monday about what they did that weekend. I never wanted to be that girl crying in the bathroom. Taylor Swift
A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station. Bill Cosby
I don't remember my parents together, ever: my father was much older, and really only interested in collecting magazines and bathroom suites; we were the only family in the area to have a bathroom suite on the lawn. Paula Yates
You know, Stephen says, in the movies no one ever goes to the bathroom. They shave, they brush their teeth. He goes right at this sort of funny taboo we have about the bathroom, and he turned it into this nightmare, you know, your worst fear of what's in there. Lawrence Kasdan
It has come to the point where if I know I'm leaving a house with a man, I can factor in a bathroom visit or a phone call or both, and when I'm done, he'll almost be done tying his shoes. Mindy Kaling
We all received invitations, made by hand from construction paper, with balloons containing our names in Magic Marker. Our amazement at being formally invited to a house we had only visited in our bathroom fantasies was so great that we had to compare one another's invitations before we believed it. It was thrilling to know that the Lisbon girls knew our names, that their delicate vocal cords had pronounced their syllables, and that they meant something in their lives. They had had to labor... Jeffrey Eugenides
John Steinbeck quote: "A man's bathroom is his castle"
A man's bathroom is his castle John Steinbeck
I lay there silently, hoarding my small dignity. I did not ask about the gate or the closet. I did not question the bedtime ritualwhere, on the cold bathroom tiles, I was spread out dailyand examined for flaws. I did not knowthat my bones, those solids, those pieces of sculpturewould not splinter. Anne Sexton
Ranger appeared in the bathroom doorway and I was too relieved to be embarrassed. "I appreciate you coming out in the middle of the night," I said. Ranger smiled. "I didn't want to miss seeing you chained up naked. Janet Evanovich
normal person's weekly chore list:1. clean kitchen.2. clean bathroom.3. clean entire rest of domicile. cleaning impaired person's weekly chore list: 1. don't get peanut butter on sheets. Dave Barry
Once, I asked my mom why stars shine. She said they werenight-lights, so the angels could find their way around in Heaven. But when I asked my dad, he started talking about gas, and somehow. I put it all together and figured that the food God served causedmultiple trips to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Jodi Picoult
Joelle cuts off his interjection and says that but that her trouble with it is that ‘But For the Grace of God’ is a subjunctive, a counterfactual, she says and can make sense only when introducing a conditional clause, like e. g. ‘But For the Grace of God I would have died on Molly Notkin’s bathroom floor,’ so that an indicative transposition like […] she says, literally senseless, and regardless of whether she hears it or not it’s meaningless. David Foster Wallace
Kurt Vonnegut quote: "Billy got off his lounge chair now, went into the bathroom and..."
Billy got off his lounge chair now, went into the bathroom and took a leak. The crowd went wild. Kurt Vonnegut
Freshly brainwashed from rehab, I carry the bottle into the bathroom. I hold it up to the light. See the pretty bottle? Isn't it beautiful? Yes, it's beautiful. I unscrew the cap and pour it into the toilet. I flush twice. And then I think, why did I flush twice? The answer, is of course, because I truly do know myself. I cannot be sure I won't attempt to drink from the toilet, like a dog. Augusten Burroughs

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