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Fox News’s Bill O’Reilly refuses to show the Muslim cartoons on The O’Reilly Factor, saying he doesn’t want to offend anyone’s religion. Someone should tell him those endless interviews with prostitutes from the Bunny Ranch and porn stars aren’t high on Christians’ list of enjoyable viewing either. Ann Coulter
When you grow older a dreadful, horrible sensation will come over you. It's called loneliness, and you think you know what it is now, but you don't. Here is a list of the symptoms, and don't worry-loneliness is the most universal sensation on the planet. Just remember one fact-loneliness will pass. You will survive and you will be a better human for it. Doug Coupland
Is there anything as incredible as the love story of your own parents? Anything as hard to grasp as the fact that those two over-the-hill players, permanently on the disabled list, were once in the starting lineup? It's impossible to imagine my father, who in my experience was aroused mainly by the lowering of interest rates, suffering the acute, adolescent passions of the flesh. Jeffrey Eugenides
Umberto Eco quote: "We were clever enough to turn a laundry list into poetry."
We were clever enough to turn a laundry list into poetry. Umberto Eco
There is light underwater, even at night, but it is a far cry from the lights that we all know and love... the light by which the reaper reads his list. Tom Robbins
Flailing and thrashing, Buttercup wept and tossed and paced and wept some more, and there have been three great cases of jealousy since David of Galilee was first afflicted with the emotion when he could no longer stand the fact that his neighbor Saul's cactus outshone his own. (Originally, jealousy pertained solely to plants, other people's cactus or ginkgoes, or, later, when there was grass, grass, which is why, even to this day, we say that someone is green with jealousy.) Buttercup's case... William Goldman
If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you’ll notice two things about them: 1. They all had editors. 2. They are all dead. Thus we can draw the scientific conclusion that editors are fatal. Dave Barry
I'm sorry," Billy says, "but I felt it was too organized. I like ellipses and teeny jottings and spontaneous poems and particularly all those devices like long lists of melancholy things. Edmund White
Mason glowers, shaking his head. "I've ascended, descended, even condescended, and the List's not ended? but haven't yet trans-cended a blessed thing, thankee. Thomas Pynchon
If there are this many visible parts of my body that are worse than normal people's, then if I start considering other aspects? personality, brains, athleticism, things of this sort? the list will be endless. Haruki Murakami
I don't have a talent, unless you count hunting illegally, which they don't. Or maybe singing, which I wouldn't do for the Capitol in a million years. My mother tried to interest me in a variety of suitable alternatives from a list Effie Trinket sent her. Cooking, flower arranging, playing the flute. None of them took, although Prim had a knack forall three. Finally Cinna stepped in and offered to help me develop my passion for designing clothes, which really required development since it was... Suzanne Collins
She considered hypothesis 3 to be quite unlikely, since she didn’t feel the least bit psychopathic, but included it in the list out of respect for the scientific method. Neal Stephenson
Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. George Carlin
There are so many qualities that make up a human being... by the time I get through with all the things that I really admire about people, what they do with their private parts is probably so low on the list that it is irrelevant. Paul Newman
When Oscar Wilde was asked in an interview to list his 100 favorite books he said he could not. When asked why, he replied, 'Because I have only written five. Oscar Wilde

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