English En
  • Deutsche De
  • English En
  • Français Fr
  • Русский Ru

We use cookies to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our marketing and analytics partners who may combine it with other information you've provided to them or which they've separately collected from you. You also may to see our Privacy Policy. By clicking the OK button below, you accept our cookies.

Authors:

Joan Rivers Quotes

Joan Rivers quote: "Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone..."

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

Joan Rivers

About author

Related Authors

Topics

Quotes currently Trending

The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those who bothered to shave. Also, there is the fear that there is an afterlife but no one will know where it's being held. On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily laying down. Woody Allen
Now, al Qaeda's on the run. Afghanistan is no longer a base of operations. The Afghan government is a friendly government that is trying to bring democracy to its people. Condoleezza Rice
Rose Schneiderman quote: "The worker must have bread, but she must have roses, too...."
The worker must have bread, but she must have roses, too. Help, you women of privilege, give her the ballot to fight with. Rose Schneiderman
Shaving was not an easy task, for his hand continued to shake very much; and shaving requires attention, even when you don't dance while you are at it. But if he had cut the end of his nose off, he would have put a piece of sticking-plaster over it, and been quite satisfied. Charles Dickens
Jimmy Buffett quote: "Under the heavens and under the sea there's a friend I don't..."
Under the heavens and under the sea there's a friend I don't know, who holds the right key. Jimmy Buffett
But my love had no intentions: it knew the future. All one could do was try to make the future less hard, to break the future gently when it came. Graham Greene
Anthony Trollope quote: "There is no human bliss equal to twelve hours of work with..."
There is no human bliss equal to twelve hours of work with only six hours in which to do it. Anthony Trollope
Victor Hugo quote: "If you are stone, be magnetic; if a plant, be sensitive; but..."
If you are stone, be magnetic; if a plant, be sensitive; but if you are human be love. Victor Hugo
Anne Rice quote: "That was my nature - going from temptation after temptation,..."
That was my nature - going from temptation after temptation, not to sin, but to be redeemed. Anne Rice
As they started across the road, a boy biked by, shooting Grant a quick look before he ducked his chin on his chest and pedaled away."One of your admirers?" Gennie asked dryly."I chased him and three of his friends off the cliffs a few weeks back."You're a real sport."Grant only grinned, remembering his first reaction had been fury at having his peace interrupted, then fear that the four careless boys would break their necks on the rocks. "Ayah," he said, recalling with pleasure the acid... Nora Roberts
Seth MacFarlane quote: "Chris Elliott could read the phonebook and he's funny."
Chris Elliott could read the phonebook and he's funny. Seth MacFarlane
Tony Robbins quote: "When people are like each other they tend to like each other."
When people are like each other they tend to like each other. Tony Robbins
I always take Scotch whiskey at night as a preventive of toothache. I have never had the toothache; and what is more, I never intend to have it. Mark Twain
We are the world. We are the people and we deserve better not because we're worth it but because no worth can be put on the incalculable, on the infinite, on life. Nick Mancuso
Katey Sagal quote: "My thing about having another child was, time's-a-wasting!"
My thing about having another child was, time's-a-wasting! Katey Sagal