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Woody Allen Quotes

Woody Allen quotes

American Director December 1, 1935

TOP 10 Woody Allen quotes

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Quotes

Woody Allen quote: "Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone you love."
Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone you love. Woody Allen
There's an old joke - um... two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of 'em says, "Boy, the food at this place is really terrible." The other one says, "Yeah, I know; and such small portions." Well, that's essentially how I feel about life - full of loneliness, and misery, and suffering, and unhappiness, and it's all over much too quickly. Woody Allen
What if the worst is true? What if there's no God, and you only go around once, and that's it? Don't you want to be a part of the experience? You know, what the hell? It's not all a drag, and I'm thinking to myself: Geez! I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get and just enjoy it while it lasts. And, you know, after--who knows? Maybe there is something, nobody really knows. I know that maybe is a very slim reed to hang your whole life on, but that's the best we... Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "Seventy percent of success in life is showing up."
Seventy percent of success in life is showing up. Woody Allen
While we're waiting for a cab I'll give you your lesson for today. Don't listen to what your teachers tell ya, you know. Don't pay attention. Just, just see what they look like and that's how you'll know what life is really gonna be like. Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain -..."
Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special. Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a..."
I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear. Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "Life is short. Short, and not about anything except what you..."
Life is short. Short, and not about anything except what you can touch and what touches you. Woody Allen
I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable. Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent..."
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman? Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "You know how you're always trying to get things to come out..."
You know how you're always trying to get things to come out perfect in art because it's real difficult in life Woody Allen
[...] I've come to the conclusion that the artist can not justify life or come up with a cogent reason as to why life is meaningful, but the artist can provide you with a cold glass of water on a hot day. Woody Allen
You know what my philosophy of life is? That it’s important to have some laughs, but you got to suffer a little too, because otherwise you miss the whole point to life. Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television."
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television. Woody Allen
Woody Allen quote: "Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's..."
Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon. Woody Allen

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